daddy's girl

Lately, I’ve been down thinking about how I suck about hiding my feelings and being ok at the same time.  Yes. Corny has been in my life for however long, I don’t remember.

Just last Friday, Saturday and Sunday, I was so happy, so happy I can’t even explain nor hide it. It was the kind of happiness you feel when you experience things being there at their right places. I was just genuinely, deeply, simply happy. Period.

And well, that period could be considered a pun because just this week, I’ve felt my head heat up and I haven’t felt that for the longest time. I was mad. I don’t know. I was jealous, maybe. Well, theres’ this guy and I really like him, I don’t know why. And I see him everyday and we do a lot of things together, with our friends of course. He’s even one of the reasons why last week was just awesome. Then, this shiny red balloon came tumbling my way just to ruin my perfect little happy life. (exaggerating..haha)

I was so annoyed that I felt like bursting. You know how it feels to like somebody and hear that somebody share a secret about how he likes this girl. Argh. The drama of it all…sucks.

So I was kind of feeling down and all that jealousy killing me. It was crazy.

Then, last Thursday  at around 2:30 p.m. while I was intently listening (yes, I was) to interest rates and money supply in our Econ 100.1 class, I suddenly heard my phone ringing. I immediately seized it from my bag and took the call. My dad answered and asked whether I was in class and so obviously I said I was. (I was even jotting down notes while we were talking). Then he asked me if I went outside because I took his call and I said, ok, I’m going out.

Of all the phone calls that make your heart swell, nothing beats your dad calling you up just to say, “Hey! I miss you. I miss my little girl.” And literally and figuratively, that call took my worries away. Yes. He called me up just to tell me he misses me and to know if I was ok, if I was doing fine.

All the bad vibes I’ve been breathing in lately just came out through a sigh. I was just surprised and really happy. I mean, I’m 20 years old, I take care of myself while I’m here in Manila. But that’s the thing…being 20 years old and being by yourself makes it all better knowing that your dad just called to tell you how much he misses you.

So, when I went home that day, I was telling myself, “Oh! Don’t be such a drama queen. You’ve been wasting your time on guys who don’t even realize your worth and you blog about them, and they hurt you but here is one guy, who loves you for nothing and cares for you more than you could ever imagine…a dad who calls you up at 2pm just to tell you he misses you. What more can you ask for? (seriously!)

So, I brush off my frown and smile for my dad who is miles and miles away from me but never fails to remember. I know he might not be able to read this (unless I let him), but I want him to know that he will always be the #1 guy in my life and I love him no matter what.

Thank you Tatay for taking my troubles away. You will always be the best Dad. And I’ll always be your little girl.

January 15, 2010 4:05 am