No. I Don't love you. I didn't even really like you. That I know now. I guess during that time I was probably in between the verge of completely hating love and falling into a serious level of depression.
But I realize now that it was all just projection. It seems so psychological in a way but that may have been may way of coping. It totally ruins your rationalities and the deepest of your feelings when someone srews you up in the worst way possible. But I don't want to see things that way anymore. I may still have pent up feelings for that person but I am better now, so much better even.
I am happy and so inspired with my studies that I have the littlest of time to even think about the most trivial and complicated of things such as love. I don't hope to find love soon. I might even be enjoying solitude too much. I don't know. But I'm sure I am happy with the way things are. And I realized I never really invested these feelings again for someone or anyone for more than 2 years now. I guess this is good. Yes, this is actually good for me. I should really enjoy this as much as I can...until the time that maybe, it's worth being irrational again.
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